Let's Talk About Death

When you freely fall from something tall, you'll never feel the horror of the whole scene. Instead, you'll relish the sensation of having lost that something that pushes/pulls you up (i.e. the normal force when you're walking or the tension on the rope when you're rappelling) and enjoy the ride. Yes, you would think about death and all but that wouldn't bother you. Carefree it is. Like flying. In the next split second, you'll feel back that something that pushes you but with a huge blow. And that's it (if you failed to manifest consciousness after).

Just a few hours ago, I lost my break and fell from about two to three stories high while trying that fade away trick we need to master in rappelling (down UP Tower). I quite enjoyed it. And after I felt a soft thud on my back, I closed my eyes and expected that I was already in heaven with all the soft clouds surrounding me. And I opened them again and (quite dissapointed) saw the same people I looked up to when I was asking questions on how to. But now, a few yards farther. They have these bewildered look on their faces (not horrified as you should be expecting) and kept on shooting suggestions on how to do the right thing. I checked myself for injuries - none except for a very very minor rope-burn on my left thumb. Someone went near and helped me gain balance to stand up and asking if I was OK.

I realized that I'm never afraid of death anyway. I imagined myself being hit by a train or be involved in a major nuclear explosion and not feel fear. Death will break your bond with life in just split seconds - very fast and unnoticeable. I'm just afraid of dodging death and feel the excruciating pain afterwards and losing my handsome physique. Haha! Because being handicapped is worse than being dead.

I still tried to practice that fade away afterwards but I failed. I think I just have to skip the activity next meeting: rappelling by fade away down Melchor Hall (College of Engineering). Oh c'mon. Talk about height.